Relationships have long been essential to human survival. Our bodies and brains are programmed to seek out connection, both romantic and platonic. And yet, these vital bonds are often the at the root of some of our deepest suffering. For decades, experts have posited that maintaining successful relationships requires a certain kind of compromise; of two people changing their behaviors and instincts to better meet the needs of the other. In theory, it sounds reasonable. But in reality, while feeling seen, valued, and loved are basic human yearnings, we can’t rely on others to make us feel whole—it must come from within. In this book, New York Times bestselling author Dr. Nicole LePera—whose integrative, holistic approach to psychology has attracted an audience of millions—offers a new path to healing relationships. Harnessing the latest scientific research, she explains how the unmet needs rooted in our earliest relationships influence our connections in the present. It is only when we take responsibility for our unmet needs, she suggests, that we can begin to coexist with others in a healthy, loving way. Whether the relationship at issue is with a spouse or partner, a parent, a sibling, a child, a friend, or a colleague—Dr. LePera teaches us how identify the wounds and conditioning that underlie discord and disconnection and begin to heal in mind and body. Complete with stories, exercises, journal prompts, and other practical guidance, How to Be the Love You Seek is poised to become an instant classic, and the go-to relationship resource for a new generation.